Life Gets Scary Sometimes! Breathe...

What I know today is that when life get tough, stressful or even painful (emotional and/or physical) our reflex seems to be to hold our breath!  Have you ever been aware that you are breathing shallow?  My theory is that when life gets scary we tend to lock up.  We want to freeze for fear of moving through the unknown territory.  It is like we really think time will stop and we can hold back from life for a while.  I would like you to ask yourself a question.  How is that working for you?

I once had a women in one of my meditation classes who said that when she was giving birth she was frustrated with how little the breathing she learned was helping.  So she made a decision to hold her breath on the next contraction to see if it was better.  She quickly found out that it only served to make the pain worse, so she returned to breathing through her contractions.

I had an aha with this experience that she shared and realized this really does apply to life - everyday we are giving birth to new experiences and opportunities.  It is natural to want to freeze up when we don't know what the outcome is going to be.  What we need to practice more of is having a little faith that the universe is taking care of us.   Going into uncharted territory can be so rewarding and we need to let go of the fear of making mistakes or failing.  This fear of making a mistake or failing is an illusion as there is no such thing.  All there is - is learning.  We learn what we like, what we don't and what we want more of in our experience through this process, which is called life!

So take some time right now and think about something recent that has you locked up in your life.  While you think about all of the different outcomes and fears that go with it, try breathing in through your nose and out through you mouth.  As you focus on the fear and breathe, you release the energy from your being.

Let it all go and know that where your mind goes it draws more of it to you.  Let go of those illusions of fear and worst case scenarios breathe them out so that you can refocus on where you really want your life to go!

You are awesome, thanks for taking the time to breathe.  You have made the world a better place by bettering yourself!

Much gratitude to you...

Grocery Store - Pay it Forward!

What I know today is that Pay it Forward is something that has been around for a while now and according to wikipedia's definition:  The expression "pay it forward" is used to describe the concept of asking the beneficiary of a good deed to "repay" it to others instead of to the original benefactor. The concept is old, but the phrase may have been coined by Lily Hardy Hammond in her 1916 book In the Garden of Delight.^[1]

I was in the grocery store the other day and ahead of me in line there was a little boy buying a pack of gum.  He didn't have enough money so he put the one he wanted back and picked a different one.  I thought to myself I should buy it for him, so I told the cashier to put it with my groceries (which happened to only be a pack of ground beef).  He looked at me with disbelief at first but then it quickly turned to gratitude.  I then said to him, "you know what I want you to do for me"?  He look up at me and sweetly said,  "carry your groceries"?  I laughed and said, "no I want you to pay it forward".  "Do you know what that means?"  He shook his head no and so I said I wanted him to do something nice for someone else that day.  As the cashier handed him his gum she reminded him to follow through on his promise.  It was an awesome feeling and such a small act.  It made my heart swell and made me feel so good!  I wonder what little ripple came from that and who the recipient was and what act of kindness they received?

What can you do for someone to create a ripple of pay it forward?  It doesn't have to involve money...

Here are some ideas:

*Brush the snow off of someone's car at the end of the work day.
*Shovel someone's walk way.
*Smile at a complete stranger and give a genuine compliment
*Plan to make a double batch of that casserole you are making for supper and tell them supper is on     you that day...
*Lend a book that you found helpful or interesting
*Write a letter and mail it to someone whom you admire and tell them what they mean to you or write a   letter to someone who made a difference in your life

What other creative ways can you come up with?  It should be something that is effortless for you and that just comes natural... We all have unique talents to share in this world!

Spread the Joy!  Would love to hear your comments on here, or stories of your random acts of kindness, no matter how old this post is! :)  Who knows you might inspire someone else with your unique idea!

Transform Negativity in your Workplace & Relationships

What I know today is that this past Monday was Blue Monday.  Blue Monday is based on six factors - weather, debt, time since Christmas, time since failed new years resolutions, low motivational levels, and feeling a need to take action.

My favourite all time quote by Zig Ziglar is: People often say that motivation doesn't last, well neither does bathing that's why we recommend it daily!!

With all this negative energy coming from every direction we can be susceptible to feel it or pick it up along the way.  Everything is energy and just like walking into a room after someone has had an argument we pick up on and feel these energies on many different levels.  More than we realize I might add.

If you find yourself feeling a little blue and don't understand why it may be that you are picking up this energy and it isn't even yours!  Try this little experiment.  Ask yourself is this mine or someone else's?  If the feeling leaves it was just something you picked up.

Last evening at my daughters soccer game I had a chance to chat with a friend.  She mentioned that the negativity at work was starting to get to her even though she is a positive person and knows she has so many things to be thankful for in her life!  What came of it was a suggestion that I find can be very powerful and yet the other person doesn't even know that you have helped them redirect their thoughts...

For example, if Bill is complaining at work let him vent for a few minutes.  Then simply ask him some questions so that you get his mind focused and redirected in a different direction.  If he is complaining about how things are around the workplace simply say, I understand your frustration.  If you could do it your way what would you like to see change around here?  Then it gets their thoughts focused on what they want rather than complaining and focusing on what they don't want.

This takes their mind off of the problem and opens up doors to finding solutions!

I have found this can take some quick thinking on your feet, but the more you do it the better you get at it.  This also works well with children.

Remember the goal here is to gently help them redirect their thoughts without them realizing you did it, then they feel like they are the one who is in the drivers seat!  It is a win, win for all!  Have fun with it!

I am back!

What I know today is that I have been away from my blog for some time!  I took a much needed break and have also had some major changes happen in my life!

At first it was shocking to think about moving over 700 miles back to my home town where my husband and I both grew up after being away for nearly 18 years!  The opportunity that was presented to my husband was an amazing one and in my heart it felt so right.  Everything was clicking into place as though it was all meant to be.  But my head was fighting it.  What about all of the friends and connections we had made over those years?  What about the kids, would they be ok with this move?  So many unknowns and yet I had to trust that it was all happening for a reason.  Now we are getting settled and it was easier than I thought!

The result?  My husband LOVES his job and being a business owner again.  The kids are loving their new schools and have made several new friends.  Our family is so happy to have us near again, and I must say it is so nice to have the kids able to see their Grandparents at a moments notice!

Thank you to all of my readers for being patient and not giving up on me!  I know many of you come here and just read old posts and are still gaining value from my past blogs.  That is the beauty of life we are always changing and yet an old article may give you something that you never saw before because  we always get what are needing for the time we are in.

For me there have been many changes and I am learning even more that I must go with the flow and know that there is no such thing as a mistake ever.  Timing and sychronicity is all there is and we have free will to change our reality by focusing on what we want and allowing ourselves to let go of what isn't working for us as individuals.

I love my new life and can't wait to see what grand and glorious adventures await!  My goal here is to be back posting regularly again, I would like to try to be consistent but again there is no right or wrong here I am only human after all and I can only work when I feel inspired and trust that I will connect with those who are meant to hear the messages that flow through me as I write.

Please know that you are unique and special, just by being who you are you make a difference in this world.  Love yourself and know who you are right now exactly as you are is enough to make a difference to others.  Always remember that!  Stop trying so hard and just be!  Thanks for who you are, live in joy!

Lighten up! Just what I needed...

What I know today is that as I figure out my business and where it is going, I know that I am putting lots of pressure on myself and getting too stressed out. I am not enjoying the process anymore as I am realizing that I am trying to fit into how others see how a business should be built.  I am also trying way too hard, instead of just letting it be what it is for now.  

What I am learning in this process of trying this and that, is that I know in my heart what is right for me and what isn't.  What works for me, who I am and where I see myself going and what doesn't.  I know there are a thousand ways to build a business and this process will truly be unique to me.  I have built a successful business before, my experience with it was that it was so easy and it all just came to me.  Why?  Because I was passionate and I just did what came natural to me.  It all just fell into my lap, and before I knew it - I had a business that was more than I imagined it could be.  So with this experience in my past, I know it is possible, and I am open to this happening again with ease and joy, loving the whole process.  I am learning to let go of the limitations and beliefs created by others and their experiences, and must now trust that I can and will allow myself to easily and joyfully let my business bloom, for now, I am simply planting seeds.  Now I must move forward with patience to see which seeds start to grow.

So my advice is this.  There is always going to be fear out there and we must learn to follow our hearts.  We must do what makes us feel good. If it feels right in your heart, then that is the right thing no matter what anyone else feels or thinks.  There will always be others who will try to disempower and create doubt, simply because they are not aware of their own power within.  Their fears within will try to bring others down rather than look within to raise themselves up.  

When making decisions about anything, we must remember we always have choices.  Here is a fun thing that I like to do when making a decision if the path doesn't seem clear or if I am uncertain.  I think of an option and ask myself does this feel light to me, or does it feel heavy?  If it feels light, I know it is the right thing, if it feels heavy I trust that and let it go.

Choices are about doing what is right for you, let go of outside factors, and what other people will think, it isn't about them, it is about you.  Whatever choice you make they will get over it.  Draining yourself and depleting yourself for others makes no sense.  It only serves to disempower you.  If the whole world could make choices around what is best for each individual this world would be a much better place to live.    

We live in a dual world and there is always going to be love and fear.  It is a choice in what we choose to experience.  I choose Ease and Joy in every aspect of my life, I hope you will too!  

Exercise:

Try it!

Tell yourself I am nothing and see how it makes you feel?  Light or heavy?

Tell yourself I am everything!

Most people will feel heavy saying I am nothing (because that is not our truth at the core of who we are.)

This is a subtle feeling the more you trust it, the stronger it will get for you as you get used to how it feels in your body.  When something is true for you you will feel lighter and when something is not true for you will feel heavier.

Your body will always let you know what is right for you.  Listen to your truth, you are the only one who can know what is right and listen to that.  

Your Emotions - What is their Purpose?

What I know today is that our emotions can really get in the way sometimes.  Or that is what we think anyway!  The purpose of our emotions is communication from our inner being letting us know how we feel about the world around us.  They can also let us know if we are on our path or not.  A lot of times most of us will try to suppress or ignore our feelings, because we don't want to be feeling that way.  And many times because we just don't know what to do with them.  Right?  Who wants to be angry?  Or who wants to be sad?  Not a pretty sight!


Do you know that we have an emotional rain barrel?  When that rain barrel is full, what happens?  It overflows.  Do you sometimes feel like you could snap at the drop of a hat?  Maybe your emotional rain barrel is too full.  At the bottom of that rain barrel is joy and happiness.  Imagine if you could release and let go of all that emotion, so that the sun could come out again.  So that you can experience life again in happy times.  


If our emotions are negative that means we are needing to reposition our selves and take a look within.  


My experience is that when we resist our emotions they persist.  So whatever you resist persists.  What can you do about this?  Accept how you are feeling!  We are not meant to hold on, we are meant to allow life and the experiences of life to flow through us.


Emotions create an energy within us.  Emotion stands for energy in motion.  Emotions are not meant to be held on to.  Many of us are carrying emotions from our childhoods as well.  Why?  Because we have not been taught how to release them and let them go!  When I tell people this they don't believe it!  Here is how I know that we do carry those emotions and that most of us have just stuffed them down inside - it as a fact. 

I have worked with clients for many years doing emotional release work.  They will tell me oh, that happened 5, 10, 20 even 30 years ago.  Yet when they start to tell the story the emotion is there as though it happened yesterday!  The tears well up -  if it is sadness, or the heart starts pounding - if it is a fear.

Life is meant to flow through us each day.  We are not meant to hang on to things that happen to us.  In a spiritual context there is a bigger picture here.  What do you need to do with your emotion?  Do you need to communicate with someone and tell them how you really feel?  Do you need to go within yourself and see what the real reason you are upset is?  Do you really just need to learn how to let it go?

Allow your inner communication to guide you, that is the purpose.   To move you and help you grow.  To learn about who you are and what you stand for.  Let go of your negative emotions by accepting that they are there, feel them acknowledge them and them set them free.  If someone or something is upsetting you ask yourself what it is that you are upset about?  Keep asking why until you get to the bottom of it.

Exercise:

Journal your feelings around something that is bothering you.  Keep asking why you are so upset.  Right the answer down, and then ask Why do I feel this way?  Keep asking after each question, until you get to the real root of it.  You might be very surprised at the real reason why you are so upset.  Use life experiences to learn about yourself and your core emotions.  Then accept them by acknowledging how you really feel.  Journal to get it out if you need to or focus on it while deep breathing until the emotion is gone.

Example - I am angry at my Sister because she is mean to me?  Why? Because it hurts.  Why?  Because I don't like being talked to the way she talks to me.  Why?  Because it makes me feel bad.  Why?  Because it makes me think I am a bad person.  Why?  Because I am not good enough.  Why?  Because I can never do anything right.  Why?  Because this is what I believe.  Why?  Because I don't give myself enough credit.  Why?  Because I don't feel worthy of people liking me.  Why?

I think you get the picture...

When Life Gets Difficult - Love Yourself!

What I know today is that life has been supremely busy in the last 2 months!  I have been going through more change and transformation, and it hasn't been easy, but let me tell you how worth it - it has been!  The difficulties have been gifts that have given me more perspective to help others.

As go through this process of building a business of helping more people through my teachings and coaching, I am learning so much about myself and others.  I have learned that there are people who are going to be afraid that I am growing and leaving them behind.  That is ok, because we each have our own journey's and we must do it at a pace that works for us as individuals.  In this process I have learned which people in my life truly love and support me unconditionally and which people have conditions or expectations of what they want from me.

The biggest lesson I have learned today as I feel the pain of misunderstanding, and fear of loss, we must above everything else, love ourselves.  No one else can do it for us.  Even your parents and family can't always give you the unconditional love and support that you need and deserve.  Even if they are doing it the best way they know how.  When we look to receive love externally we may get disappointed, and we may also disappoint others.  I have learned that when I believe in and love myself truly magical things begin to happen.

We are spiritual beings having a human experience, there is a much bigger picture out there then many of us are even aware of.  I have learned that fear is the illusion that stops us from being who we are meant to be.  It makes our energy contract and it blocks us from experiencing ease and joy in our lives.  Love is the only thing that is real.  Love expands our energy and who we are.  Love allows us to be connected within to our soul and divine guidance.  It is where our creativity comes from which allows us to have ideas and possibility in our lives.

So please I ask you right now, to take a moment and love yourself, truly accept who you are.  Allow yourself to open to your unique talents, gifts and strengths.  Let go of how others have made you feel about yourself and the things you have done.  Today is a new day.  You are special and you can make a difference to those around you, just by loving and accepting yourself!  

Exercise:

Place your hand in the middle of your chest over your heart centre and feel the warmth of love beneath it.  Know that your true source is from Love and that as you open yourself up to it, you will receive love, and more importantly become love.  Breathe in self acceptance, breathe out self judgement.  Do this a few times, until it feels good to you.  Next breathe in self acceptance and breathe out feel gratitude for who you are.  Now say to yourself, Who I am at my foundation is love, who I am right now is perfect, kind and gentle.  I am light and love, and I am the only one who is allowing my light to be dimmed.  I let go of believing other people's judgements on me, I am the one who knows my truth.  I trust my inner knowing and guidance, knowing that I am love at all times, I just need to always remember that I am Love and Love is me we are one.