Are You Abusive - To Yourself?

When you do things for others, do you do them out of duty, guilt or charity?  As creatures of habit, I think many of us have learned a behaviour that needs to change.  Several weeks ago I posted an article about What Feeds Your Energy and What Drains It?  Click here to read  If you are doing something because you feel you should, then you are coming from the wrong place.  When you offer your help to someone, it should be coming from a place of genuinely wanting to help and from love.

So take some time and think about it before you say 'yes' to someone.  You should only say yes if you really want to do it.  If not - you really shouldn't.  It is time to shift our thinking out of a mentality of lack.  What I mean by this is that you think, "If I don't do it then who will?"  When you shift your thinking to plenty and abundance, it should be more similar to  "I can't really do this, but I am sure there is someone who can and will help," then you must let it go.

I don't know about you, but I would much rather have someone offering their help from love than regret.

Next, we need to let go of keeping track.  When you do a good deed, it needs to come from a true place in your heart, doing it because it makes you feel good to make a difference.  This then feeds your energy as well as the other person's energy.  Can you see the difference?  When you give, you get - but it doesn't always come from where you think it will.  Good things will come in other ways and from other places that are a match to what you need,  instead of the old school thinking of "I'll scratch your back, you scratch mine."


Let life flow and trust that the right people are there at the right time and that it isn't about keeping track but instead about feeling good while making a difference to those around you - it will come back to you ten-fold!

Exercise:

Take some deep breaths, in through your nose and then out through your mouth.  Really breathe deeply, your belly should come out as you do this, as your lungs fill your chest should rise last.  Do this a few more times letting go of all tension in your body, feeling more relaxed with each exhalation.  Just let it all go!

*As you read this - take time to pause and close your eyes as you experience it in pieces.  Really allow yourself to feel...

Place your hand on your chest and focus on genuine, unconditional love.  What does it feel like?  Feel its warmth, breathe into this love that is within you.  It comes from within, NOT externally from others.  Let yourself feel it, connect to the love and acceptance within you.  Tell yourself that who you are right now is enough.

You don't need to do anything more, that you are enough right now, you are whole and complete.  You are a good person, with good intentions.  You need to love and accept yourself.  You don't need to do things to please others or for acceptance.

You are unique and special in your own way.  So honour who you are right now.  The things you love, your talents and strengths are who you are and so valuable.  There are people in this world only YOU can make a difference to.   But first you have to be true to who you are.